is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
