we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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