Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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