I hate all girls vehemently.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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