is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm both gender and math confused
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
