And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
