Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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