And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize