Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
