3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
