Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
