I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize