apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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