you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize