is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
