They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
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