the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
