You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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