You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
