This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
