there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
