i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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