Don't you send me to vm
Having a random hookup so left but love u
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
