I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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