I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
