I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
