i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize