Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Let's get the cat blown out
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
