plz talk dirty to me
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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