4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
