its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize