I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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