one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
