Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
