she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
