This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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