Well apparently he's into motor boating.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We got so high we made milksteak
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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