I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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