you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
