She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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