First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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