thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
