Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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