I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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