Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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