i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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