Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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