If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize