1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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