Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
