there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think im going to throw up on grandma
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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